Esquire Sued by Birthers

Why can't I get a lawsuit for the nasty things I've written? (read more here)

Your Church's Answer to Those Damn Kids & Their Hormones

She Kind Of Loves You

But you're not really sure. Of course, she said, "----", and then she did that thing, with her lips,



and of course, you weren't really sure, because it was only for a night, in the dark, because that's better than in the light, yet still, you thought, forget about the alcohol, something's really going down here, and maybe, just maybe, you really feel it for her...

The Honeymoon Was OK

For the most part.

Men's Restroom

Some guy at the opera let me go ahead of him.



Gee whiz. He didn't have to do that.

When He Came

Bounding Down the Stairs.



You knew he was the one described to you in a multitude of dreams.

Don't Forget to Comb Your Hair

The catastrophe could be avoided.

Are Your Neighbors Having Jungle Sex?

Does one of them squeal like a pig?

Fret for Your Figure

And fret for your bank account



And fret fret fret